Writing a casual dating profile that's honest and fun

Your profile is doing the talking while you're busy doing something else, so it's worth twenty minutes of effort. The good news: an honest, specific profile beats a polished one, and it's much easier to write.

What a casual dating profile needs

A casual dating profile needs four things: a clear line about what you want, a few details that sound like you, a photo or two, and nothing that gives away who you are offline. Here's how that breaks down.

Besides the free text, the members area has fields such as who you'd like to meet, the age range and distance you're happy with, and lifestyle details like smoking and drinking. Fill them in honestly: they help people see at a glance whether you might suit each other, and save awkward questions later.

Start with what you're looking for

Put it in the first line or two. On a casual site that's the thing everyone wants to know, and saying it plainly saves you from conversations that were never going anywhere. A few examples to adapt:

• "New to this and looking for some no-strings fun with someone easy-going."
• "After something regular and relaxed with one person: good company, no relationship."
• "Open-minded, curious, keen to take things slowly and see what clicks."

If you have firm limits or deal-breakers, mention them briefly and calmly ("not looking to meet anyone who's attached"). Keep it to one line, and don't turn the profile into a list of rules. Not sure what you want yet? The beginner's guide has five questions to answer before you start.

Make the rest sound like you

Detail is what turns a profile people skip into one they answer. "I like music, food and travel" describes almost everyone. "Will travel a long way for a good gig, makes a decent curry, still recovering from a camping trip in 2019" describes someone.

Three or four specific things are plenty: what you do for fun, what a good evening looks like to you, something you're quietly proud of or a bit rubbish at. Self-deprecating humour goes down well. Moaning doesn't, so skip "no time-wasters" and "why is everyone on here fake"; it reads as grumpy before anyone's said hello.

Keep it playful rather than explicit. A hint of cheek tells people you're relaxed about why you're here. A detailed list of what you're into tends to attract the wrong attention and put off the people you'd actually enjoy meeting. That conversation can happen later, with someone you've got to know.

A before-and-after rewrite

Most first drafts are vague, and the fix is almost always to be more specific. This is a made-up example showing the same person's profile twice:

Before: "Hi, I'm fun, easy-going and like a laugh. Love music and going out. No time-wasters please. Message me if interested."

After: "First time on here, looking for something fun and relaxed, not a relationship. I'm the one dancing badly at the back of a gig, and I make a proper Sunday roast. Tell me the last thing that made you laugh out loud."

The second version says what they want, gives two real details, drops the grumpy line and ends with something easy to answer.

Three example profiles to borrow from

These are made-up examples, not real members. Use the shape, not the words.

Example one: "First time trying this, so be nice. I'm after fun and good company with no strings: someone to share a few drinks and see where the evening goes. Weekend walker, weekday desk-dweller, makes a mean Sunday roast. Tell me the best thing you've eaten this month."

Example two: "Recently single and not looking for anything serious. Easy-going, chatty, terrible at keeping plants alive. I'd like to meet someone for relaxed, no-pressure dates and see if there's a spark. Happy to chat on here for a while first."

Example three: "Open-minded and curious, but I like to get to know someone a bit before meeting. Into live music, bad films and long lunches. Looking for something fun and regular with one person, not a relationship."

Each one says what the person wants, gives a couple of real details and makes it easy to start a conversation. The first-messages guide shows how to use details like these when you write to someone.

Photos: clear, recent and within the rules

Photos are reviewed before they appear, and the image rules don't allow nudity or lingerie shots. That suits a beginner anyway: the photos that do best are relaxed, clear and recent, taken in good light, looking like you do now. You'll usually need at least one photo before your profile is complete.

• Lead with a clear photo if you're comfortable showing your face. Add one or two that show what you enjoy.
• Skip the group shots as your main picture. Nobody wants to guess which one is you.
• Use photos that aren't on your public social media. A reverse image search can link a photo back to an account with your real name.
• Check the background. House numbers, car registrations, a work lanyard or anything with your name on it can give away more than you mean to.

Intimate photos don't belong on a profile, and think carefully before sending them to anyone in chat. Sharing someone's intimate image without consent, or threatening to, is a criminal offence across the UK.

Who can see your profile, and what to leave out

Your profile can be seen by members of this site and of partner sites in the same network, so write it on the basis that a fair number of people will read it. Members who joined elsewhere can see yours and message you.

Leave out your surname, employer, exact address and phone number. A general area is enough. You can share more later with someone you've got to know, ideally after a call and a meeting in public. Our safety page explains why, and how to spot someone fishing for details they don't need.

There's also an optional, paid ID badge: you confirm your identity with a photo ID and a selfie, and your profile shows the badge. It's optional for most people (some sign-ups, such as those made through a VPN, are asked to verify), and it only tells others that your ID matched your face. Nobody checks what members write about themselves, on your profile or anyone else's.

Check it before you publish

A quick read-through catches most problems. Before you save, run through this:

1. Does the first line say what you want?
2. Are there at least two details nobody else could have written?
3. Is there something easy for people to reply to?
4. Is your main photo clear, recent and just you?
5. Have you removed your surname, workplace, address and anything visible in the background?

When your profile's ready, read how it works for what happens next, including which parts are free and which need a membership, and see prices for how renewals work.